Monday, December 5, 2011

Calling God to the witness box - III

Disclaimer: The comments and views expressed here are the author's own and not aimed at hurting anyone's beliefs and feelings. If you are offended, author seeks apology and wishes to inform that these are author's personal thoughts and he is free to so express. Content here is not endorsed/sponsored by any institution or group.

To re-connect to the subject of this series of posts, please have a look at the previous two posts on the subject at:
Also recommended are some very thoughtful reader comments on the first post listed above.

We grow, physically and mentally. As we live on, our perceptions of people, beliefs, society, life and ourselves also evolve based on what we have been through and observed around us. This concept of evolving thought captivates me to lead me to believe that as if 'some one' is always working on us into making us what we are. A reflection of this can be seen here as well and has been mentioned here and there in this blog as well time and again. Be it how airplanes fly, or be it how luck and prayer works our perception of everything goes through this evolutionary process!

Switching to the context of this post after that prelude and citing from conclusion of Calling God to the witness box - II

"Since childhood onwards, like everyone else, my understanding of God has been changing based on my own experiences and observations. I hope someone will relate to those when I discuss the same later..."

As long as I remember, it was never my aim to follow my religion to-the-letter. Although it was an expectation from me that was stated with a certain subtlety every now and then both at home, school and while venturing about in the civil society. I still keep getting these lessons sometimes a bit strictly too. My upbringing and schooling in somewhat conservative environment also imbibed the basic tenets of my religion pretty deeply during those young years. Pretty early on, I was, without any doubt, able to comprehend that those tenets actually are a reflection of what a humane living should be. To be, support, defend and follow the 'true'. That was my childhood God. A true power that always supports the righteousness and the right. Becoming the 'right' became an underlying agenda. The definition of 'right' however was guided by what was expected from me. Those expectations being dictated by my own actions that brought be good words from people I cared for and respect. Parents, Grandparents, Teachers, and some neighbors. That agenda, I pursued as per my capability and patience.

Being right in all doings was so important that it became almost a continuous thought always reigning my mind. Trying to put my actions in a rationality guided by this theme as much as possible. Being right here does not mean to force my own opinions and expect unconditional acceptance thereof but being true to your inner self in all your actions and deeds. In that I thought, I will have support of the ultimate 'right' power and this rationale gave me courage to pursue that 'theme'.


That faith in the right stayed with me for a long time until some people close to me got hurt. There was no logical path that led to the incidents that my puny understanding of spirituality was able to comprehend. The silence of intellect underlined by a constant beep of doubt akin to the sound of silence that we hear when there is absolute no noise around us. I reasoned that the ultimate enables also befalls this pain when He could have saved us all of it. I could not agree with the hypothesis of 'God testing our faith' because I was told over and over that He knows all. All means all, including the strength of our resolve towards His will.

The reasoning offered by some that 'there is some hidden betterment for all in this' just did not work for me. These events brought in a law of pre-ordained-destiny as an explanation to the happenings. No matter how much right you do. Whatever is your destiny must befall you. Or honor you if it is so destined. No matter how much you pray, worship, wear symbols around your neck or apply sacred colors on your forehead (the pun is not intended).

Does that mean that there is no need to be right or true? That one will ultimately obtain what they deserve? Or instead of deserve, which makes it sound like we are the judges, lets say 'what is destined for them/us'? Those questions arose and remained unanswered by n number of religious speeches and books. It became a belief that destiny is a constant and it leads you to itself. Whenever I follow that school of belief, I am the happiest person. There are no regrets and no obligations towards any religious or spiritual duty. All the need for being a 'believer' in context of popular meaning of that term, is diminished beyond any significance or abolished altogether. The only belief is in doing the right with all your courage and capability and see the destiny slowly unfold in front of you. Amazing!

Does that means that we can turn into a villain without any moral obligations? Not really. There is no place where our deeds and actions are not going unaccountable for. We are constantly sending into the cosmos, a positive of negative energy by our actions and deeds. The pain inflicted on another being causes your 'cosmic vibes' to play against your tune. This energy dominates our inner self and shapes our future by acting as a driver of luck and chance opening up new doors to success or bringing upon failure and doom in otherwise.

The shine in your eyes and assertiveness in your statements comes from the positive or negative 'credits' you collected that way. The 'light (or darkness) within' shows and has its effect on the world outside. Good happens. Bad stays away (or the other way round). The creature gets his share of destiny. The believer credits it to God. The Atheist connects it to randomness of possibilities.

...and the thinker keeps wondering...!

[concluded]