Calling God to the witness box - III

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To re-connect to the subject of this series of posts, please have a look at the previous two posts on the subject at:

• Calling God to the witness box - I
• Calling God to the witness box - II

Also recommended are some very thoughtful reader comments on the first post listed above.

We grow, physically and mentally. As we live on, our perceptions of people, beliefs, society, life and ourselves also evolve based on what we have been through and observed around us. This concept of evolving thought captivates me to lead me to believe that as if 'some one' is always working on us into making us what we are. A reflection of this can be seen here as well and has been mentioned here and there in this blog as well time and again. Be it how airplanes fly, or be it how luck and prayer works our perception of everything goes through this evolutionary process!

Switching to the context of this post after that prelude and citing from conclusion of Calling God to the witness box - II

"Since childhood onwards, like everyone else, my understanding of God has been changing based on my own experiences and observations. I hope someone will relate to those when I discuss the same later..."

As long as I remember, it was never my aim to follow my religion to-the-letter. Although it was an expectation from me that was stated with a certain subtlety every now and then both at home, school and while venturing about in the civil society. I still keep getting these lessons sometimes a bit strictly too. My upbringing and schooling in somewhat conservative environment also imbibed the basic tenets of my religion pretty deeply during those young years. Pretty early on, I was, without any doubt, able to comprehend that those tenets actually are a reflection of what a humane living should be. To be, support, defend and follow the 'true'. That was my childhood God. A true power that always supports the righteousness and the right. Becoming the 'right' became an underlying agenda. The definition of 'right' however was guided by what was expected from me. Those expectations being dictated by my own actions that brought be good words from people I cared for and respect. Parents, Grandparents, Teachers, and some neighbors. That agenda, I pursued as per my capability and patience.

Being right in all doings was so important that it became almost a continuous thought always reigning my mind. Trying to put my actions in a rationality guided by this theme as much as possible. Being right here does not mean to force my own opinions and expect unconditional acceptance thereof but being true to your inner self in all your actions and deeds. In that I thought, I will have support of the ultimate 'right' power and this rationale gave me courage to pursue that 'theme'.


That faith in the right stayed with me for a long time until some people close to me got hurt. There was no logical path that led to the incidents that my puny understanding of spirituality was able to comprehend. The silence of intellect underlined by a constant beep of doubt akin to the sound of silence that we hear when there is absolute no noise around us. I reasoned that the ultimate enables also befalls this pain when He could have saved us all of it. I could not agree with the hypothesis of 'God testing our faith' because I was told over and over that He knows all. All means all, including the strength of our resolve towards His will.

The reasoning offered by some that 'there is some hidden betterment for all in this' just did not work for me. These events brought in a law of pre-ordained-destiny as an explanation to the happenings. No matter how much right you do. Whatever is your destiny must befall you. Or honor you if it is so destined. No matter how much you pray, worship, wear symbols around your neck or apply sacred colors on your forehead (the pun is not intended).

Does that mean that there is no need to be right or true? That one will ultimately obtain what they deserve? Or instead of deserve, which makes it sound like we are the judges, lets say 'what is destined for them/us'? Those questions arose and remained unanswered by n number of religious speeches and books. It became a belief that destiny is a constant and it leads you to itself. Whenever I follow that school of belief, I am the happiest person. There are no regrets and no obligations towards any religious or spiritual duty. All the need for being a 'believer' in context of popular meaning of that term, is diminished beyond any significance or abolished altogether. The only belief is in doing the right with all your courage and capability and see the destiny slowly unfold in front of you. Amazing!

Does that means that we can turn into a villain without any moral obligations? Not really. There is no place where our deeds and actions are not going unaccountable for. We are constantly sending into the cosmos, a positive of negative energy by our actions and deeds. The pain inflicted on another being causes your 'cosmic vibes' to play against your tune. This energy dominates our inner self and shapes our future by acting as a driver of luck and chance opening up new doors to success or bringing upon failure and doom in otherwise.

The shine in your eyes and assertiveness in your statements comes from the positive or negative 'credits' you collected that way. The 'light (or darkness) within' shows and has its effect on the world outside. Good happens. Bad stays away (or the other way round). The creature gets his share of destiny. The believer credits it to God. The Atheist connects it to randomness of possibilities.

...and the thinker keeps wondering...!

[concluded]

Happy Birthday to you

Dedicated to those wonderful persons who have been there on my way on life to influence me in one or the other positive way. People who have been in a role of teacher-in-disguise in bringing me up and taught finer skills of being a human, a learner, a professional, a student, a friend...the list goes on.

What coerced me into this post is that while leisurely browsing my calender, I observed that few of those gem of a persons share their month of birth with this month. A very close friend, students, professional mentors, my spiritual guide, friends with whom I share many high-five moments, and a someone who is simply a delight to be around; all share this month of birth!

This also brought into perspective the fact the persons who play a nourishing role in bringing us up at every stage of life. That there are many virtuous human beings who, even while not being a part of our family, delight us no less than someone very close to oneself just by 'being there once upon a while'. Subtract the influence these people had in our lives, and we would be much less of professionals and much much lesser of persons.

People we come across impact us in one way or the other both positively and negatively. And once in a while, we all would come across a person who will influence us with one of their qualities so much so that we try to imbibe those qualities in our persona, want to be perceived like we perceive them. Or simply enjoy their company that it is never enough of being with their presence. To be in presence of someone so virtuous is a blessing in itself because such an happening needs a magical stroke of The Cosmic Artist.

Holy spirits keep on conspiring and creating opportunities to bring the learner and these teachers-in-disguise together so that the ordained treasure of wisdom may be passed on to the humble seeker.

And it is not only this wisdom that is gifted away by a teacher-in-disguise but also the shimmer to an ailing spirit by the one who emerged out of nowhere, the that last breath of courage enthused  into a tired mind by someone is no less than a Midas touch. Someone who told you that your nose is perfectly placed. ;-)  That you look fine in that color. That you are not fat. That you are doing just fine. And these words from them, you believed them with absolute trust and emerged more lively! I doubt there exists a person who does not have fond recollections of such beautiful persons that will always resound in their minds as from the ones who made a difference.

And what moment could be of more significance than the one when this journey of their lives began which was destined to cross roads with ours to drop in our laps, a Black Pearl of pure joy, enthuse new zeal, take away a self-doubt or just make our day with a heart warming smile. :-)

That is the day when they were born in this world. That is the day we should celebrate because that is when these beautiful human beings were set on to a road to these however small but pre-ordained associations with us that were going to make life of a truth seeker so very liveable.

Today may be that day in their life or maybe not but I wish to announce that I am glad that these beautiful people were born to make a difference in my life. Happy Birthday to all wonderful persons.

I hope that some day, I might be worthy of the same honor to someone else.

The learning eye

Here, I mentioned an unconscious phase of life when we are unaware of ourselves being destined to be certain sorts of individuals.

But what happened when we were loud conscious about our being? What created us from then on? Were the decisions we took still ours? Or were they again orchestrated by a supernatural conspiracy that defined us in the first place? Do we still rely on the Strokes of the cosmic artist to keep on painting our selves with those finer strokes?

Let us put it this way that the cosmic artist was still at work, providing us with small glimpses of opportunities to learn. We were already receiving everything from the surrounding world. But during the unconscious state of our creation, we were gifted by yet another tool.

The learning eye. Eye being a metaphor for our all senses including gut feelings.

An individual is now not at the disposal of the surroundings to influence her. She is now able to filter out, from what she receives from the world, what she wishes to allow to influence her. She is no longer helpless in hands of the cosmic artist, the strokes of whom created her while she was in that unconscious state of creation.

The individual can now ask questions about, inquire about, ignore, get impressed by, be lured into, abstain from, get addicted to, and explore the experiences that she is receiving from the world around her.

When an individual observes the world around her, she is now, based on the foundation of her self created by the expert strokes of our cosmic artist, able to decipher these observations into different interpretations. Certain aspects of the world make a greater impact on her mind. Certain traits get fortified and certain are lost forever. An individual is able to observe certain stimuli with a greater extent of absorption and these stimuli result into a greater impact in herself than in someone else audience to the same situation.

That possibly is the reason why all the kids of a mother are never alike in all behavioral and aspects related to intellect and reasoning. Why all students in a class are not equally competent in all subjects. Why all are not equally sensitive to values and feelings of others.

Why Mother Teresa was hurt from the plight of the poor far more profoundly than anyone else? Weren't many people watching them earlier?
Why Mahatma was hurt by the discrimination of Indians abroad? Weren't many others facing the same for a century till then?
Why, while we were schooling, a difficult topic for others might, almost certainly, have been a piece of cake for us? I know it is true for many of us.

That is by the virtue of bent of mind that we acquired without even knowing of it. And as the time came by, we were able to utilize it to best of our wisdom gained till then.

I remember asking questions to my father about numerous things. Almost infinite. And being an experienced engineer, he knew the answers to all of them!
And I also remember listening to answers for hours.
I remember him asking me to hold the spanner in a certain way to avoid bruising the fingers if it slips.
I remember watching every smallest movement of his expert hands when he used to fix some nitty-gritty around the house.
And I remember imitating those small moves, slowly learning to use those small tips to perform exactly the way those trained hands would. Would hold a hand-held grinder so that the debris would fly away from my eyes. Would slow down a hack-saw so that the blade wont break at the end of the cut. Would hold a chisel so that it wont shatter when hit, and so on...

I remember observing drops of water falling through the leaves of a tree in the rain. And then, I remember asking myself how the tree keeps mostly dry around the base? The answer came from the eye only. Most of the leaves drop the water falling on them on a slightly outer leaf. Nature has arranged them so. Till the last drop falls from the lowest leaf on the tree, the drops have reached the periphery of a well grown tree. With some exceptions though!

Wondering the purpose of mentioning the above observations here?
It is to appreciate the learning eye that we are gifted with after we come out of the cocoonic phase of unconsciousness and start observing the world guided by our premature sense of observations crafted into us by the cosmic artist.

I wonder who provides us those small opportunities to learn and observe. May be its our cosmic artist still at work. But I do know that it is up to that learning eye that can now grasp and absorb what is being thrown at it from the outer world, but, now with an additional ability of discretion.

But the rules that govern this discretion have already been programmed into every individual when they didn't even knew it was happening, so that they are again, in a way, destined to be certain sorts of individuals.

Ironic?
Is it?

That's how Black Pearls are sometimes!